Making Decisions

My Chronic Illness/Chronic Pain Support Group yesterday discussed Making Decisions. We all have difficulty making decisions sometimes, and I know that some people have great difficulty making even basic decisions.  I discovered. in my research that there is an actual name for this great difficulty: decidophobia (very creative).  It may come from decisions in the past that lead to a bad outcome, or from being ridiculed or chastised about decisions or outcomes. May also develop from low self esteem, insecurity and lack of self confidence. Symptoms include panic, feeling of impending doom, procrastination or mental paralysis regarding decisions.  Some treatments include: give yourself time, gather information needed, avoid pressure from others, be realistic about your fear, and about the decision you need to make, put things into perspective, learn to accept some discomfort of not knowing or not being certain, stop obsessive thoughts.
I listed some facts to recognize regarding making decisions. These are:

You may need to make a decision without all the info you think you need.

You may get info later that would have affected your decision. That's life, not a flaw in you or your decision making process.

Few options/decisions are perfect.

Strong emotions like fear, anger and jealousy can distort thinking and affect decisions.

Trust your gut. Decisions based on instinct are often right, decisions based on emotion seldom are.

We also discussed how having a chronic illness or chronic pain affects making decisions:

1. Medication or the illness itself can cause “brain fog”, making clear thinking difficult.
2. Fatigue or other symptoms can make following through with a decision difficult.
3. If not able to work and/or living on disability, finances might be tight, decreasing options. 
4. Chronic conditions can affect self esteem and self confidence.
5. Being dependent on others in some areas of life can affect how they treat us in other areas. They may think we can't make our own decisions, and may try to make them for us.
6. Living with a chronic condition requires many life altering decisions that most people don't need to face.
   
   I think the 'take home message' here is that it is important for us to give a decision the amount of attention it deserves. What to wear should be a much quicker decision than whether or not to have surgery. Learn to make unimportant decisions quickly, saving your energy and effort for the more important ones. If you have a time of day when you are most alert and focused, do your important decision making then. If you don't trust your own judgment, share your thoughts with someone whose judgment you do trust, and ask for feedback. Ask for help in gathering information and advise, but make your own decisions.